Beg My Broken Heart To Beat
by heartdevoured
Summary: Rossi uses Reid when his wife comes into town. Reid ends up finding out and relies on one person to save him...I think you know who that is. Based on Evanescence song Cloud Nine.


**So…how you guys been?**

**Good?**

**Good.**

**Okay…business time!**

**WARNING: Rossi/Reid (one sided), Morgan/Reid (future)**

**Timeline: "Reckoner" 5x03**

**Makes sense, right?**

**Okay.**

**Reid/Review/Enjoy!**

**Gubleronics**

Chapter 1: I Just Want To Feel That High

Spencer crutched away from a very shocked David.

He just told him that maybe he thinks it's a better idea to stay friends instead of pretending to be something their not.

Yeah, that's right. He said it.

He didn't really care what David thought anymore.

Only because David didn't care what he thought.

He's just going to let David be David and stay selfish.

_**If you wanna live**_

_**Let live**_

_**If you wanna go**_

_**Let go**_

_**I'm not afraid to dream**_

_**To sleep, sleep forever**_

Love.

That's all he wanted.

He didn't want the relationship to be perfect, he just wanted to feel like David really cared.

_**I don't need to touch **_

_**The sky**_

_**I just wanna feel**_

_**That high**_

Too bad David only wanted to rub the relationship in people's faces.

But he didn't want to love him.

_**And you refuse to lift me**_

Spencer thought he was for real when he confessed his "love" to him.

He was mistaken.

_**Guess it wasn't real after all**_

_**Guess it wasn't real all along**_

But he didn't want him crawling back to him in apology.

If he doesn't love, so be it.

It's how he's going to stay.

_**If I fall**_

_**And all is lost**_

_**It's where I belong**_

Spencer crutched into Garcia's room and sighed.

Garcia and her brightness turned around.

"What's the matter pumpkin? You look a little out of character."

Spencer sighed again and sat in the other chair, setting his crutches down on the side.

"It's nothing Garcia."

Garcia's face turned worried. "Don't give me that mess, tell me what's really wrong."

Spencer hesitated. "Well…you know that Rossi and I were in a relationship, right?"

"_Were_?"

"Yeah, Rossi never cared about me at all, he just wanted to fling the relationship around in his friends' faces. But I'm okay, because I really don't care. I didn't have feelings for him at all."

_**If you wanna live**_

_**Let live**_

_**If you wanna go**_

_**Let go**_

Garcia looked pained as she ran a comforting hand down Spencer's arm.

"Besides, I heard his second wife was coming in town and I guess that was why he was so quick to get with me. I found out and I wasn't going to let him do that."

_**I'm never going to be**_

_**Your sweet, sweet surrender**_

"Oh, Boy Genius, Rossi gets what he deserves, throwing your feelings around like that. Fret not, Garci will always be of assistance."

Spencer gave her a side-ways look. "Now Garcia, don't get any ideas and don't do anything that'll make you go in hiding."

She laughed darkly. "Who said I was going to get caught?"

Spencer laughed and got to work, still thinking about how this was going to go down for David.

_**Guess it wasn't real after all**_

_**Guess it wasn't real all along**_

After the terrible case, Spencer crutched out of the bullpen.

Only to be stopped by the one person he was avoiding.

David.

"Hey Spencer wait up!"

That made him crutch faster.

But he caught up to him.

"What do you want Rossi?"

"I just want to…apologize for the way I…used you."

"You don't need to apologize. It's just the way I'll have to stay since nobody really loves me."

_**Remember**_

_**That all alone**_

_**Is where I belong…**_

With that he limped away and caught up with the train.

He was surprised to see Derek there.

Derek glanced up and smiled wide.

"Pretty Boy!"

_Oh no. Another person I want to avoid…_

He liked Derek.

He loved Derek.

_**In a dream…**_

_**Will you give your love to me?**_

_**Beg my broken heart to beat**_

But Derek doesn't love him.

"Hey Reid, how you been doing?"

"How does it look like I've been doing?"

Cold.

"Whoa, I'm sorry. I know it was a tough case and we didn't catch the guy."

Spencer sighed.

"I know. Sorry I snapped at you."

_Now shut up and kiss me. _

_**Save my life**_

_**Change my mind**_

"It's all good. How about you let me give you a ride? It wouldn't be good for you to get on this train since it's so crowded."

_No. Don't do it, don't do it, don't do it!_

Spencer tangled his fingers together. "Aahh…I guess so."

_No!_

Derek smiled an easily charming smile. "Well come on."

Spencer crutched through the crowded substation up the stairs.

He didn't know what he was thinking.

He wasn't going to get his feelings returned tonight.

At least he thought so.

_**If I fall**_

_**And all is lost**_

_**It's where I belong**_

They were inside his car before he knew it.

Spencer was awkwardly quiet when Derek started down the road.

Only to stop in a secluded area.

Spencer looked at him with wide eyes.

"What are you doing?"

Derek's hands tightened on the wheel.

"Reid…Spencer…I…"

_Spencer? No one's called me that in years…this can't be good._

"I love you."

Spencer's breathe caught his throat as he chocked on it.

"What?"

"I-I love you. I know you probably don't feel the same but I do. Spencer, ever since I saw you walk into the BAU I couldn't take my eyes off of you. You were so young, clueless, and beautiful. I knew I had to have you. I went on for five years with out telling you. I just need to get this out."

Spencer couldn't move.

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Really?"

"Yeah, really."

"I love you too." He blurted out.

Derek leaned over and did the unexpected.

He kissed him.

Everything was moving impossibly fast.

Then he finally knew.

This was what needed to happen.

This is where he finally belonged.

_**Remember**_

_**That all alone**_

_**Is where I belong**_

**Author's Note: I wasn't planning on that happening, I meant for it to go in the second chapter. But something will happen so don't go away yet…**

**REVIEW!**


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